Tired

I see it has been 10 days since the last post. The fatigue is setting in. Many days I say I will post something after dinner/feeding. No.

So, here are some highlights. In no order b/c I’m not being a real clear thinker these days.

The 6-day sunburn vacation was just a preview of what I will experience when I am finally done w/ radiation treatment; at least a week of continuing pain, and even some new and different ailments. So for the first few days of renewed death beam, I was feeling OK. But now (3 days in) the neck is all burnt again, and mouth sores are returning.

The worst pain and disfiguring was about 5 or 7 days after the ‘vacation’ started. Aforementioned sores and pain, AND the bonus of  seeing my face about 1/2″ fatter/rounder due to swelling. That entails things like the inside of my mouth swelling inward and even my ears getting thick.

That is just after getting out of bed. The goo on the sides of the mouth is from the very viscous saliva that is also poisoning all flavor for me. That residue on the right end of my mouth is where I the saliva ran out as I was laying on my right side. New pillowcase; matter of fact, new sheets. “Why didn’t you breathe through your nose?” the astute reader says. B/c both nostrils were clogged up by blood boogers caused by the death beam passing through the inside of my nose. Notice my puffed up drunk’s nose; that ain’t from too many cocktails! The mouth guard is an old friend I’ve had for 22 years for bruxism (look it up; it’s not pertinent).

Once I got to 150 lbs. and eating about 300 calories per day, I gave in and went for the gastrointestinal feeding tube. I now consume 6 cans of some protein/calorie shit every day, via a tube that was surgically placed just below my left rib into my stomach. I had Brigitte take a photo, but we both decided (mainly her) that it was a form of pornography and not really…………………….. well, that photo above may qualify as porn too, but I’m just trying to inform you (friends and cancer infoseekers) what one endures fighting SNUC.

Here are some photos w/ comments:

Photo Deleted: judged to be porn by spouse and select readers.

One night’s output of spit/phlegm. I often am jolted awake by a big coughing up of a huge phlegm ball. This is good, as it allows me to breathe clearly again. As you see, sometimes I even get a little bonus of some blood.

I said photos, so here is at least one:

That may have been the worst. So far.

Brigitte just left me, to go earn some money. She has an assignment in San Francisco today and tomorrow, so about one week ago I called my brother Dave. He volunteered without hesitation to come out here (from Dallas) for a week in order to help out and see his little brother. He had already mentioned this possibility to his boss (Verizon Wireless cell site engineering dept.) and so it was not a problem. It’s good to have loving mates and siblings when one has cancer. If you don’t have one, GET ONE!

There are other  things about which I could write, but it’s 6:30 PM, and I’m getting tired. Go to Aging in order to see some real aging.

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About chucksnuc

If you stop struggling, then you stop life.
This entry was posted in Cancer treatment. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Tired

  1. Bruce Olinder says:

    Chuck,
    I so admire your not sugar-coating your experience.
    Most people in your experience deny or hide.
    Keep the faith, there is something better in the future.
    Bruce

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