Here’s a word you may have seen me use before: cachexia. (the ‘ch’ is a hard k sound)
I thought it was just weight loss. Not so quick there Scooter; there’s more:
Cachexia ( /kəˈkɛksiə/; from Greek κακός kakos “bad” and ἕξις hexis “condition”) or wasting syndrome is loss of weight, muscle atrophy, fatigue, weakness, and significant loss of appetite in someone who is not actively trying to lose weight. The formal definition of cachexia is the loss of body mass that cannot be reversed nutritionally: Even if the affected patient eats more calories, lean body mass will be lost, indicating there is a fundamental pathology in place.
Sooooo, where was I? Today I started writing down all the food I eat and its estimated caloric content. The goal is 3000/day. And the cancer diet rules to which I have been adhering are being ‘eased’ just a little bit. You try to eat 3000 calories/day while eating smart. No; fast food is not smart. Not even bacon and candy bars. Imagine that?! It’s more flesh while avoiding as much processed food as possible. What sucks is the realization that even a good pork sausage is processed food. Ditto breads, sweets (bad anyway), pastries (bad anyway), most canned goods, you can figure it out. So I have more meat, beans, quinoa, avocados, etc. Last night dinner was 1/2 lb. of Spencer steak (my portion, not for both of us), and potatoes/zucchini gratin. Animal fat, and …… animal fat.
This brings to mind something I said to my Mom in ’95 when she was here in L.A. to mother me back to health after a big motorcycle racing crash of mine at Willow Springs Raceway. It was Turn 8, the fastest part of the track. Doing about 145 mph when I hit oil deposited on track by another bike up ahead. 7 bikes had just gone down in it, and the flagman had yet to get out to red-flag the session. Closed-head trauma (aka brain damage; you had no idea …………… right?) and 3 1/2 weeks in the hospital. After the splenectomy and a few days in ICU, I was basically in a wait/improve/heal mode. At one point, in my grogginess, I looked at Mom and said, “I know what’s wrong with me, there’s just nothing I can do about it.” I was told later that this had a very disturbing effect on Mom and saddened her a lot. Being a Salt-of-the-Earth Kansas girl, she never revealed any of this to me. I know what is wrong w/ me. There’s just nothing I can do about it.
Except feed myself and wait.
I think Mom would say something like that to me now.
And now for some exciting news: Hair. It seems like in just a day I have sprouted some eyebrows. Partial eyebrows. And how about that hair on the side of my head! So I guess my old frenemy Radiation is starting to dissipate. And check out that ONE long strand of eyebrow above my right eye. It never gave up. That hair strand is a survivor, baby!